Just Jot January – 2022

Well it’s a good news/bad news day for me today. The good news is that our daughter is doing really well after her jaw surgery. I am so impressed by the fact that she is only having to deal with some rubber bands holding her mouth together and she can remove the bands to brush her teeth and they are wide enough to permit her to use the large syringe without the tubing in order to eat. When I had the surgery done my mouth was completely held together by wires for six weeks and I had to use a tubing at the end of the syringe which I slipped down the side of my cheek toward the back of my mouth. Surgical techniques sure have come a long way! She is not in a lot of pain and while she has had some uncomfortable days, it is going along smoothly.

The bad news is that we lost my mom on Friday. I’m still kind of in shock at how quickly she went, but also grateful that she did not suffer and that she was the one directing the action for the most part. When she was offered ventilation, she refused. She knew the potential consequences and chose not to try the antiviral medication either. When she slipped out of touch with us by not opening her eyes or even acknowledging my sister’s presence we knew she was on her way to be with our dad. It is interesting that January 11 would have been their 80th anniversary. The 17th was the day my dad passed away 40 years ago so I think he called her up to have a second honeymoon.

Of course I thought she was invincible when she walked across the Golden Gate Bridge with us at age 90!

So for the last few days I’ve been working in my studio and listening to Dean Martin and the Rat Pack sing the songs I grew up with. I’ve only cried a couple times. I’ve been getting lots of condolences from friends and I realize that almost everyone has lost at least one if not both of their parents by now so I am extremely grateful for the length of time I have had her and the fact that she was here at Christmas and we had such a good time. She told me that she felt like she was wanted and that she belonged, not like we were just having her as an obligation. That is the best memory. RIP mom. Hope you and dad are dancing to all this music!

About scr4pl80

I'm a 60-ish, married, mom to 3, creative soul looking to make the world a better place one smile at a time.
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52 Responses to Just Jot January – 2022

  1. It is so sad when you lose your parents! So sorry, but try to be good to yourself, and allow yourself time to grieve, as long as you need. Try to remember the fun, good things about them. I lost both of mine and my two brothers, and it is a tough pill to swallow, but fortunately I have my hubby, and he is wonderful to me.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. John says:

    I am so sorry for your loss. I know how it feels when my mum went to be with the Lord in 2012. πŸ™πŸ»

    Liked by 1 person

    • scr4pl80 says:

      Thanks John! I just stopped by your blog. Great photos of LV. We went a few years ago and want to go back sometime. Hubby was having problems with his leg so we didn’t get to walk around too much. Thanks for stopping by my little piece of blogosphere.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Debbie D. says:

    I’m so sorry for your loss, Janet! 🌹 Your mother was lovely and had a good long life, but it sounds like she was ready to go. Still, it’s always shocking to lose a parent. May your memories be a comfort to you. And I hope your daughter recovers well. Jaw surgery must be a terrible ordeal.

    Liked by 1 person

    • scr4pl80 says:

      Thanks Debbie. It gets easier every day of course, both with my mom and with my daughter. She has some periods where she gets really frustrated but actually she is doing really well. And they changed the procedure so much from when I had it 36 years ago!

      Like

  4. E.A. Wickham says:

    Thank you for posting photos of your mom. She was beautiful. I’m so sorry for your loss and hope you allow yourself lots of time to grieve.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I’m so sorry for your loss. She sounds like a very special and strong person – to have even wanted to walk the Golden Gate Bridge at age 90. Wishing you much peace and strength during this time.

    Liked by 1 person

    • scr4pl80 says:

      Thanks so much. She never wanted to be left out of things so she was right there when I asked if she wanted to go. Truthfully, she didn’t even need the walker except for once on the way back where she had to sit a minute.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. ghostmmnc says:

    So sorry to hear of the loss of your dear mother. May your family find peace in the wonderful memories you have. ❀

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Tamara says:

    I am so sorry for yours loss. I was shocked, too. Just the other day you mentioned she was hospitalized, and the next thing I hear, she’s gone.
    I truly think she *was invincible walking across the GGB!
    How wonderful that you had one last Christmas together. And now she celebrated her anniversary with her husband.
    Hugs to you!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. She left you with so many wonderful memories. I love the thought that she is now with your dad celebrating their life together.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Thinking of you
    *hugs*
    ❀

    Liked by 1 person

  10. I’m sorry for your loss. Both of my parents died in January 30 years apart. My dad on the 11th and my mom on the 22nd. It’s still a lousy month for me. Yay for your daughter. A co-worker had that surgery in the 80s and she always was wired shut for 6 weeks. Lost a lot of weight but she got the results she wanted.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Becky says:

    Thinking of you! πŸ’•

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Ally Bean says:

    My condolences on your mother’s passing.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. LA says:

    Thinking of youπŸ’—πŸ’—

    Liked by 1 person

  14. You have such beautiful memories – I adore the idea that she was being called for a second honeymoon with your dad. She was ready and happy with her life. You’re a wonderful daughter to support her in her decisions and wishes. Perhaps you’ll be inspired to create some beautiful sympathy cards as you embrace your emotions and listen to music that reminds you of your parents. Hugs and prayers to you and your family.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. debscarey says:

    Janet, I’m so sorry to hear you lost your mother. She was quite a lady, and it sounds like she chose how she left in the same manner as how she chose to live. What a wonderful way to think of her and your father together again.
    So relieved to hear that your daughter’s surgery has gone well & that she is recovering.

    Do be gentle with yourself in your grief. A huge hug to you for your loss m’dear x

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Ritu says:

    Oh, Janet! I’m so sorry for your loss, but now, mum and dad are together again, so some solace is to be taken in that. πŸ’œπŸ™πŸΌ
    And glad your daughter’s op went well, and that recovery appears to be going smoothly.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. My condolences for the loss of your mother, Janet. It is so hard. I am glad your daughter is doing well. One of my school friends had this op when we were 16. Her jaw was also wired closed for six weeks.

    Liked by 1 person

  18. J-Dub says:

    What a loving tribute to your mom. The idea of your parents on their second honeymoon makes me smile. May your memories of her sustain you during this difficult time.

    Liked by 1 person

  19. John Holton says:

    Maybe they were planning a big party for your parents’ 80th anniversary… In any event, it sucks losing your mother, and I’m sorry for your loss. She looked like a fun lady. I can tell she died too young…

    Liked by 1 person

    • scr4pl80 says:

      Yes, she was only 98. She wanted us to throw her a big party for her 100th birthday but maybe she realized that she was the only one left alive in her generation so if she wanted to enjoy her party she should go where they are!

      Like

  20. Scarlett79 says:

    Prayers Mz. Janet…I’m sure she’s with your dad β™₯️β™₯️

    Liked by 1 person

  21. joey says:

    I really liked the timeline, he called her up for a second honeymoon, but Janet, I am so sorry for your loss. I’m sure she would appreciate you choosing music to honor memories of her ❀

    Liked by 1 person

  22. Aww Janet, I’m so glad your daughter is healing nicely! But I am so sorry to hear about your mom. Remember the good times with her! And it sounds like you are πŸ˜ŠπŸ’›

    Liked by 2 people

  23. What a wonderful memory! Her loss in this life will be immeasurable but I am glad you had her that long and that she had you! Hugs

    Liked by 2 people

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